The story, morning glory, is simple: Zak Starkey won’t be joining Oasis for their upcoming reunion tour, much to his immense disappointment. The bloke just can’t catch a break. The drummer, freshly fired from the Who after 30 years of service, appeared on BBC Breakfast on May 27 to share he was “gutted” that the Gallagher brothers chose someone else. “I texted them and said, ‘Why am I not in it?’” Starkey explained. “You know, if you get a new drummer, you get comfortable, don’t you? You get comfortable with new musicians, and I think that’s what’s happened, and I’m all right with that.” (Joey Waronker, the victor, worked on a Liam Gallagher and John Squire collaborative album last year.) Starkey joined the Britpoppers back in 2004 and drummed on both Don’t Believe the Truth and Dig Out Your Soul, attaining sideman status during that time period. He departed in 2008, but now, Starkey would drop everything to go on the tour. “God, yeah,” he clarified. “Greatest rock-and-roll band of my generation. Greatest rock-and-roll singer of my generation.” Dare we say the only reasonable solution to all this is joining Foo Fighters?