It is hard to be a progressive Muslim in today’s riven, regressive, fanatical and tribalised world. It just got harder. Since January, groups of parents in Birmingham – most British Muslim – have stood outside primary schools and protested against teachers who are committed to teaching children about equality and respect for all, including LGBTQ people. Hundreds of pupils have been kept out of school.

This unseemly conflict started at Parkfield Community School, judged outstanding by Ofsted and known for its broad and open learning environment. A welcoming sign outside is written in six different languages. Suddenly none of that mattered. Young mums and various agitators stood outside and railed against sex education classes which “promote” homosexuality to their innocent babes.

Andrew Moffat, a deputy headteacher who created the transformative and inclusive curriculum, has been vilified and threatened. Shabana Mahmood, the local Labour MP, stands by the rights of the homophobic parents. Now the contagion has spread to Manchester and other cities.

No time for silence

Meanwhile this week, in the autocratic Muslim Kingdom of Brunei, new laws have been announced making adultery and homosexuality capital offences. George Clooney and Sir Elton John have called for a boycott of hotels owned by the rulers who have bought up big businesses and glittering properties across the west. Homosexual males and females are treated horrifically in all Muslim countries. In the globalised world, increased freedom leads to increased repression.

As all this unfolds, British thugs, extremist right wingers and racists are using the Brexit chaos to organise and build a vast anti-Muslim movement. We saw some of them in action in Westminster last week. These white “Christian” reclaimers are gathering and becoming more brazen and popular in other EU countries and beyond.

The protesting Muslim mums and dads, born in Britain, are benighted, locked into reactionary values

So, here is the wrenching choice, the unbearable dilemma. Any criticism of Muslim attitudes and behaviours gives racists more ammunition to use against us. I know this column will be put up on some hate sites. However, to remain silent about homophobia in Muslim lands and communities would be unforgiveable.

Egalitarianism is an indivisible principle. Muslims can’t demand fairness and justice for themselves and also claim they are entitled to discriminate against and dehumanise groups who have their own long histories of discrimination and suffering. Worse still, they repudiate Muslims who are gay, most of whom live in dread of being found out. Some of those schoolkids may one day need to come to terms with “sinful” sexual identities.

Walking away

Khakan Qureshi, male, Muslim, gay and support worker for the homeless in Birmingham was one of them. He told a newspaper: “If I had had sex education like this in school, I wouldn’t have been bullied and scared.” Musa, a gay teacher from Libya, told me last week he was thinking of giving up on Islam, because of the schools dispute: “They know nothing. Their heart does not love someone like me. I pray near them and this is what they think? That I am dirty and God hates me?”

Sir Michael Wilshaw, former head of Ofsted, commented on the school disputes on Radio 4: “[T]hey’ve got to understand that they are living in a pluralistic society with liberal values, that strongly believes that people should be treated fairly and equally.” That is what my mother, Jena, also believed. The son of a close friend came out to her. His family went hysterical. Jena stepped in: “He is happy. Do you want him to be unhappy? In this country our children have rights. He’s still your son, still a Muslim. Allah made him. Who are you to say Allah was wrong?” I miss her so, this uneducated, but wonderfully enlightened mum.

The coming confrontations will not be between gay people and Muslims, but decent humans and those who are set to destroy decency

In contrast, the protesting Muslim mums and dads, born in Britain, are benighted, locked into reactionary values. In a 2015 survey for Channel 4, 52 per cent of British Muslims disagreed that homosexuality should be legal in the UK. Only 18 per cent agreed.

Yet talk to them about “Islamophobia” and you will hear the most passionate arguments and compelling stories about what that means and why it’s wrong. They cannot see their own double standards. Nor do they understand the impact of their iniquitous views on LGBTQ people as well as other Brits who have always stood up for migrants, refugees, racial and religious minorities. Muslims are making enemies of friends just when we face an existential threat.

The coming confrontations, they need to understand, will not be between gay people and Muslims, but decent humans and those who are set to destroy decency, mutuality and the common bonds of humanity. Which side will they be on?

@y_alibhai